Okay, my friend Kevin had an Office Hoes and CEOs Party they other night. After having a few drinks I made my way to the bathroom to find a kid passed out on the bathroom floor. I’ve seen this plenty of times So I thought nothing of it. I stepped around him and used the bathroom as all of his stupid drunk friends barged in. The closed the door right behind them, at this point I was a little squemish about the whole situation. They paid zero attention to me and started slapping the kid on the floor to wake him up. When I was all done taking care of my business I looked down at the kid and noticed that he looked like he was absolutely dead. I started screaming, “Check his pulse!” After about 25 seconds of us beating the hell out of this kid to wake him up Kenny, Kevin’s roommate, comes in and says, “GET THIS MOTHER FUCKER THE HELL OUT OF HERE!” Turns out the kid is on heroin and is passing out in the bathroom. From there we had to pick the kid up and carry him in the Jesus Position about 50 feet out of the party. We carry him outside and walk him to the nearest corner to try and get him a cab. No one wants to pick him up because he seriously looks like he is about 5 seconds from death. We ended up leaving the kid and his friend out on the sidewalk.

Doing drugs is not the way to go. Fuck that shit.